R is for RACE TO NOWHERE

R is for RACE TO NOWHERE

Disclaimer: You can't view the trailer by clicking on the arrow above. 

 If you'd like to view the trailer (and I hope you will), please click here.

About a year and a half ago, the parent of a former student sent me an e-mail and invited me to attend a screening of the documentary "Race to Nowhere".  His children's new school was hosting a screening, and he thought the content would be right up my alley.  After I looked into it, I decided he was right, and went to see the film.  It was SO up my alley, that I chaired a committee to have my children's school host a screening at our local high school.

What's so great about the film?  It forces parents and teachers to ask themselves a LOT of questions about the current structure of the education system, and its often misguided emphasis on "more is better".  It speaks to this in both curricular and extracurricular arenas.  Many children and teachers are interviewed in the film, and the overall opinion is that we're asking our children to be jacks of all trades and masters of all!  I'm not sure whether I'm remembering this from the film, or whether I thought it up myself (I often pat myself on the back for genius insight that turns out to be something I've heard from someone else and misfiled in my brain;-), but it seems like when I was in high school (25 years ago...holy crap), kids were recognized when they did one thing well.  For instance, if you were great at sports- awesome!  If you were a mathematician- super!  If you were a musician or drama buff- terrific! Now, it seems like you've got to be an athlete who plays an instrument in the local symphony who also gets near perfect grades, and oh yeah, who is also very attractive with straight teeth and no pimples.  It's like the impossible has become the standard toward which we're pushing our kids.  With these standards, success is practically not an option.

So, the same week I saw this film I read Amy Chua's book Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother.  Comparing Race To Nowhere with Tiger Mother was like visiting Hawaii and Antarctica in the same week- two totally different experiences!  I walked around for weeks with the main points of both swirling in my head, realizing that each represented a point on a continuum of expectations.  But where did I fall as a parent, and where did I need to fall to make sure my kids were adequately challenged, but not overwhelmed? Looking for the answer to this question is a huge part of my parenting journey! Somewhere in the middle lie some best practices for expectations that will enable our children to excel. 

 What is the key?  I'm not sure but I'm going to suggest that it's made up at least partially of something  I discussed in my "K" post on knowing your child's limits.  Know what he/she can handle- how much pressure, how much criticism, and how much work.  Help your child to see the fine line between being an active participant in school activities and overextending oneself to the point of exhaustion. 

Remain steadfast in your decision to protect your child from too much pressure.  It can be challenging to do so when it seems like everyone around you is doing everything (to me, it can feel like a disarmament effort- becoming vulnerable for the greater good by giving something up ;-), but stay strong.  You know what's best for your family.  In the end, that's all that matters (but in the meantime, I highly recommend the movie! ;-)!